Agar Moqa Mila

Girl: Agar moqa mila to tum mujh se shadi karo ge...??
Boy: Agar moqa mil gaya to phir shadi kerne ki kiya zaroorat hai.

America Ja Rhi Ho

Wife: Me America ja rahi hoon apke liye kya lau
Husband: Aik American Ladki
Wife Wapas Aye
Husband: mera gift!
Wife: 9 mahine intizaar karo.

Girl Without Clothes

How does a cricket commentator explain a girl without clothes? No cover , No extra cover , silly points , 2 fine legs. A deep gali & some little.

Aage Piche Se

Aaj Kal Ki Ladkiya Bahut Romantic Ho Gai Hain
Photocopy Ki Dukan Pe Jati Hai or Bolti Hai
‘Bhaiya Jaldi Jaldi…
Aage Piche Se DO DO Baar Kar Do’.

New Couple in Train

New couple train se jate huwe surang se guzre
HUSBAND: agar pata hota surang itni lambhi hai to koi faida utha leta.
WIFE: haye Allah
To kya wo aap nahin thy.

Pani Wala Daba

Bus Driver:
Kuri Ne Tenu Thapr Kiyoon Marya?
Conductor:
Pani Wala Daba Kuri Di Seat Thalay C Mein Keya Bibi Zra Lattaan Chuk Mein Apna Pani Kdna Ay!

Buri Aur Badtareen

Buri aur Bdtareen Situation..
Buri: Jab aap kay Bachoon ko aap ka used Condom Mil jaiay..
Bdtareen: jb woh aap say Zidd karnay Lagian kay issay Phulla kay do.

What is Recycling

What is Recycling?
A Sheikh used Condom.
Then give it to his SON to use it as BALLON.
and
After Bursting give it to his Daughter to use it as HairBand.

Zero Meter Dulhan

1968
Dulha Jahez Mein Tv Mangta Tha
1978
Motor Cycle
1988
Plot
1998
Ac N Car
2009
Dulha Jahez Mein
Zero Meter Dulhan Mangta Hai

Girls Hostel Mei

girls hostel me phone aya: rekha hai kya?”
warden ne pooncha aage kya lagati hai,
jawaab aaya abhi to pata nahi pehle stayfree lagati thi.

Chal Bhag

beta: papa condom kya hota hai?
papa: chal bhag mujhe nahi pata.
beta: tabhi to hum 7 bhai-bahen hain!

Reliance Girl Ki Bra

ek reliance girl ki bra par likha tha
“karlo duniya mutthi mein”
to uske panty per kya likha hoga
“lifetime incoming free”

Peeche Pade Rehte Ho

miya aur bibi me bhayank jhagda ho gaya. miya gusse se tilmilata hua chillaya
gaa*d maar doonga!!!
bibi boli: age ki to sochte nahi, bus peeche pade rehte ho..

Gandhi and Mallika

similarity between gandhi & mallika !
dono ne kapde tyag diye. ek ne desh ke liye, doosre ne deshwasion ke liye. aaisi
azaadi aur kahan?

Reaction of Girls

the reaction of girls after exams & after sex is the same :-
1) kitna lamba tha, kaash thoda time aur mil jata
2) pehle kitna darr lag raha tha, baad mein pata hi nahi laga
jab ho gya to :-
3) mere to chhoot gya tha
4) teen ghante muje to saans hi nahi aayee
5) aaage ka to theek tha peeche ka kitna mushkil tha.

Sex Maza Ya Mehnat

rich man 2 poor man: arey ye to batao sex maza hai ya mehnat?
poor man: sahab maza hi hoga mehnat hoti to ye bhi aap humse karwate.

Sex Bar Bar

matrinonial ad: wanted a girl, age no bar, height no bar, looks no bar, colour
no bar, caste no bar, money no bar, but sex bar bar bar bar…

Bahu Boli Pranam

bahu, saas ki tange daba rahi thi, lehnga ooncha ho gaya,
bahu boli, pranam!
saas boli kisko?
bahu boli, sasur ki ranbhumi aur inki janambhumi ko..

Meri Bra Utaro

Wife-meri bra utaro
Husband-ye le
Wife-ab panty bhi utaro
Husband-ye bhi le
Wife- “khabardar agar aage se mere undrgrmnts pehne.

Malkin Aur Nauker

Malkin or nauker kidnap hue, or dono ka R A P E hua.
Police: tumne unka chehra dekha tha?
Nauker: malkin se pucho, mujhe to ULTA kiya tha.

Ladki Pehli Dafa

Girl:wo kia hai jo lrki pehli dafa krwate hue pain ki waja se roti hai?
Pappu:kaan mai ched
MORAL:aap b apni soch pappu ki tarah saf rakho.

Husband on Suhagrat

Husband on suhaagrat-Teri aankho mein doob jaaun, Teri zulfon mein kho jaaun, Tere jhumko pe jhool jaaun..
Wife- Neech bhi jao ge, ya kisi aur ko bulaon.

Jad Aapji Da

Jad aapji da janam hoya
te tusi nange si
te cheekan maar rahe si,
te hun jad tusi nange hunde ho
te koi hor cheekan marda hai.
Sab time-time di gal hai!

Chalo Ab Dikhao

Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team bani antakshari khelne ke liye.
Girls: Hum tumko harakar dikhayenge..
Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao...

Arey Itna Bara

Girl : Arey itna bara munh mein kaise daloon gi.
Boy : Jaldi se munh kholo.
Girl : Oops sare kapray geelay ho gaye.
Boy : Aur lo gee.
Girl: NA baba na yeh Gool Gapey tum he kahoo.

His Girl Friend

Fraz Sahab 2 his girl friend:-
Tina.....! Aao khelein gay..
...
Nai Fraz ap Hamari le len gay.

Yehi to Pyar ki kasoti hy.
Nai mri bohat hi choti hy.
Dekh tre liye is dil me kitna pyar bhara hy.
Nai mujhe pata hy apka kitna BARA hy.
Dekh ye tra HUSN aur nikhar dega.
Ji nai Fraz ye meri PHAR dega...

Parday Lagwa Lega

Old Wife: bathroom k parde lagwa do
Husband: Q ?
Wife:Naya parosi dekhne ki koshish karta hai
Husband:1 bar dekh lene do phir wo khud parday lagwa lega..

Uff Kya Kar Rahe

Uff Kya Kar Rahe Ho??
Aisa Mat Karo...
Please Mat Karo...
Aisa Nahi......
Mat Dabao....
Neeche Kyun Jaa Rahe Ho??
Ho Jayega.....
Kaha Tha Mat Karo...
Ho Gaya Na....
Message Khatm!!!

Please Mat karo

Uff Kya Kar Rahe Ho??
Aisa Mat Karo...
Please Mat Karo...
Aisa Nahi......
Mat Dabao....
Neeche Kyun Jaa Rahe Ho??
Ho Jayega.....
Kaha Tha Mat Karo...
Ho Gaya Na....
Message Khatm!!!

Please Mat karo

Uff Kya Kar Rahe Ho??
Aisa Mat Karo...
Please Mat Karo...
Aisa Nahi......
Mat Dabao....
Neeche Kyun Jaa Rahe Ho??
Ho Jayega.....
Kaha Tha Mat Karo...
Ho Gaya Na....
Message Khatm!!!

Keep Your Character Good

Professor: To Keep Your Character Good
You Should Think All Woman As Your Mother
Students: But Thinking All Women As My Mother
Will Make My Father"s Character Bad.

My Left Leg

Girl: My Left Leg Is Lunch
And My Right Leg Is Dinner
What Would You Like To Have?
Boyfriend: I Would Like To Have Snacks
Between Lunch And Dinner.

A College Girl

A College Girl Was In Jeans Pant
And Zip Was Open.
Boy Went And Told
"Miss Please Close The Door Of
Your Taj Mahal....
Here My Qutub Minar Is Dancing"

A Guy Picked Up

A Guy Picked Up For A Date।
Guy: Why Are You Wearing Your Belt Around Your Knee?
Girl: I Promised My Mother
That I Wouldn’t Let You Touch Me Below My Belt।

Who Did It

A Contest In A Girls College:
Write A Short Essay Which Contains
Sex, Religion And Mystery.
The Winners Essyy Was-
"Oh God! I Am Pregnant
And I Wonder Who Did It"

The Best Vehicle

Girl Is The Best Vehicle In The World
Front Two Bumpers,
Back Two Bumpers,
Self Lubricant When Hot,
Finger Touch Ignition,
Monthly Automatic Engine Oil Change,
Every Type Of Piston Fits,
Highest Mileage Of Nine Months
In Just Two ml Fuel.

On My Bed SMS

I Wish You Were Here
In My Room
On My Bed
With The Lights Off
Under The Blanket
And I Will Show You My....
New Watch! It Glows In The Dark.

A Girl Danced SMS

A Girl Danced On The Stage
Everybody Clapped
She Stripped Off Her Clothes
Nobody Clapped...
Why???
Because Both Hands Are required for Clapping!

A Girl Friend SMS

What Is The Difference Between
A GIRL FRIEND And MOTOR BIKE
MOTORBIKE is First
Kicked And Then Used,
While A GIRLFRIEND Is
First Used And Then Kicked.

Responses During Sex

Responces During/After Sex
Girl friend: Oh Darling! It Was So Nice!
Call Girl: Chal Fatafat Nipat!
Padosan: Aate Rehna...!
Wife: Tell Me What is Tomorrow"s Lunch Menu?

Good Sex SMS

Good SEX is My favourite,
I Do It Regularly...
Do It And Feel Good..
You Will Enjoy It...
I Will Die Without It...
So S-Sleep, E-Eat, X- Xcercise
So Do Sex Regularly...
you Dirty Mind